It was 11:09am when police received the phone call that lead to the gruesome scene on Mapleview Street in the house 1 block away from the main road, house 309. The dark blue exterior of the small bungalow looked totally normal to anyone who passed by the house. It was when police entered the house that they were shocked to see the atrocities that had taken place. Inside they found the house to look almost vacant. The rooms were lacking a lot of furniture some only having a bed or sofa. It was only in the living room where it appeared the crime had took place. The carpet in the middle of the room was soaked in blood and the walls also had splatters of blood on them. Police also found male and female clothes and undergarments on a beige sofa, that when tested appeared to have semen on them. Police think this could mean a sexual assault might have occurred. Most gruesome of all the body of male covered in blood from head to toe expect for a small section of his chest, which was completely clean except for a message written in red lipstick. The message appeared to have stated “For the time I was too scared to do anything.” Police predict the cause of death was from a stab wound in the lower left abdomen as well as deep slits in both of his wrist. These were his only visible injuries. Upon further investigation police were able to identify the body as Mark Turnwer. Mark Turnwer appears to be a 19 year old from Alberta Calgary and only lives around 10 minutes away from this house according to police reports. He attends Calgary University where he studies business and also plays basketball on the universities team. This case played as a very important clue in discovering who is committing these crimes. Police were able to link this case to similar one where the victim was also male and share the same writing across his chest except it said “For those who are still finding their power.” His name was Charlie Smith and like Mark Turnwer he too excelled in school and sports but was only 18 years old. Perplexed by their similarities police decided to reevaluate who Mark Turnwer and Charlie Smith were and found out they have both been accused of sexual assault. Police believe this to be very important information in finding who this serial killer is. They are continuing their investigation and will report as more information arises.
Safiya,
The use of imagery and syntax further emphasized important moments within the article which is a great objective to achieve within writing, nicely done! One thing I would recommend is to add in a resolution to the news article instead of ending it right away, this fulfills the curiosity of the reader.
Great story, its very creative. I would only like to point out that some sentences and details are redundant. For example”It was only in the living room where it appeared the crime had took place” and “The message appeared to have stated…” are unneeded because the details in the rest of the text suggests it anyway. Regardless, this was a great news article.